locked doors

locked doors.

every choice i made
every single day
every way
i have to pay

living in the past
hating the present
afraid of the future

i never learned to listen.
always ripping open my
freshly dug sutures.

dealing with the consequences
of my actions
left alone
in an orderly fashion

overwhelmed with my decisions
left with nothing more
losing myself each time
i close and lock another door.

everything i touch
crumbles into ruins
everything i love
ends before i knew it.

I came into this world alone
I walk this world alone
I'll leave this world alone.

brain on my shoulders
heart on my sleeve
taking each step
towards a newer me.

working for myself
looking for an answer
trying to make it in this world
corruption spreads like cancer.

falling, grabbing, leaving
gasping
reaching
for a unknown source
opening a new door
feet planted on the floor.

every choice i make
every single day
every way
reflecting new ways.
learning from my mistakes.
10/9/08

watching

watching.

watch me disappear

watch me walk out the door

watch there be nothing left

but my heart scattered on the floor

i gave it my all

i watched it fail

im tired of these eyes

they left me to kill.

i watched you try

i watched me shut you down

i watched my lungs fill with water

until i drowned

i watched the tears pass

i watched the days go by

i watched as the love of my life

was no longer mine

no longer apart of my life

i saw him see her

and i lost all

i watched myself try and be strong

and fail

now theres nothing for me to do

but walk out this door

opening a new chapter

watching ..

2/18/08

Masked

Masked
2/22/08

Grasping tight
finally got it right
an endless fight.

eyes open
mouth dry
nothing left to do
but live your life
and when your numbers up
it will be your time to die.

so reach for the sky
never weakening your fight
against this calamitous world
smothered by society.

Closes Her Eyes

She shut her eyes
in hopes
to find peace.

too much noise
to the point it hurts
get away
run for it.

left in a dream
holding consciousness
running..
for your life

destination.
she finds it
a world of respect
quiet,clean, and fun
everyone loves everyone
can't go wrong.

She opens her eyes
and realizes
the darkness of reality

left alone
from her warmth
she closes her eyes
to get her dream back

out of her reach
now shes forgotten
the love and peace
in her dreamland destiny.

always wishing it true
closing her eyes
in hopes to find
peace of mind
before she dies.
2/22/08
-Ginnies

Holding Tighter

Holding Tighter
8/15/06

The minute you let go
i held on a little tighter
the minute you burnt out
i became your lighter
to spark the flame

the minute i thought you were lost
i never stopped looking.
the second i layed eyes on you
i knew what i would go through
for someone in my life
like you..

You fill in the holes
i always avoided
i went around them
and drowned in them
in tears of regret

with every moment passed
it built up a little more
of hatred and stupidity
because i led the reputation
of being a stupid whore.

thats not who i am
or who i'll ever be
now that i found you
i will never leave

i care too much
i could never let go
when your grasp gets lighter
i will only hold on tighter
until my life fades
into off whites and grays.
..and ill still be holding on.
living day by day.

-Ginnies

with out a sweater.

with out a sweater.
9/18/06

with every word said
i believed it true
with every action
i became more intune
without a chance.
the cold air hits me
and i button my sweater
but im still cold
so i walk...

everything is passing
slow..
with out a chance i trip
and fall..
i lay on the ground
with no where to go
but here..

my heads against the pavement
and the world around me
with no one to help me up
my sweaters ripped
and im even colder.

reality gave me whip flash
no longer able to understand..
the one emotion i never knew
so here i sit
screaming inside.
until my voice disappears
along with everything else.

with every word said
i believed you
with every action
i loved you more
with out a chance
it ended
and now im cold.
without a sweater.

-Crystal

2007

2007


The senior class is in the clear
with all the memories
held close and dear

All the parties,
and good times had
some end good..
some end bad..

We watched 06, 05, and 04
walk on out the Citrus doors
Wanting to be them
more and more..
as the years went by.

07' started at the bottom
with hands reaching for the top
we finally hit the ceiling..
when Graduation drops.

We will walk down the field
in a single file line
with eyes facing forward
never looking behind.

Some will be successful
some may not be
but i have a feeling
the class of 2007
will embrace the moment to be free.

5/1/07
Written by: Crystal MacGinnis